


Q Branch Mugs

by captainpixie



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond - All Media Types
Genre: 00Q - Freeform, Complete, M/M, Skyfall, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-30
Updated: 2015-05-30
Packaged: 2018-04-01 23:54:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4039522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainpixie/pseuds/captainpixie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone in Q-Branch has there own mug, even James Bond and Alec Trevelyan (thou of course Alec's is fire proof)</p><p>Or</p><p>In which Bond muses on the individually of the Q-branch mug's and how best to ask his quartermaster out on a date and Alec attempt's yet again to get his favourite minion to notice him as more than a friend.</p><p>(now bata checked :) )</p>
            </blockquote>





	Q Branch Mugs

**Author's Note:**

> This was one of thou' random 3am I can't sleep I just finished watching Skyfall why is my Q mug empty post's. It started of as a sleep deprived ramble that got a bit out of hand. there will be no follow up to this, I don't really write as a general rule. this hasn't been bata checked but I ran it threw the spell check. (I'm dyslexic so cut me a break with the spelling/grammar ok) if anyone wants a crack at it bata wise go for it.
> 
> EDITED TO ADD: - look, look at the beta check that the lovely Zoolooney did for yours truly, SOOO many mugs of tea for you xxx
> 
> ANOTHER EDIT: - I've gotten some really awesome feedback on this, thank you so much to everyone. a few people have express an interesting in continuing this story and I'll be very honest with you all, I simply don't have that in me. I'm not able to undertake such a mammoth task and for what I would imagine for this 'Verse' it would be quite a big undertaking to really do justice to the whole storyline I would love to have followed, I'm going to post up what I would have liked the story to have become and I'll happily support anyone who might wish to give it a go :) so see the end note's for detail's :)

The Q –Branch Mugs!

It’s that time of day where the overworked, tired, and at-the-end-of-their-ropes people of MI6 will congregate in the various break rooms and cubby holes that held the most precious of possessions of and in any department; the object so sacred and worshiped that only the stupidest of idiots would dare sabotage, steal, or otherwise damage it (see disciplinary report 66X34 for Alec Trevelyan - 006).

 

The Tea Kettle. An item so revered and loved that no expense was spared by any department when ordering one.

 

James Bond was one such person. As he flipped the switch on the kettle in front of him he reached up to grab a mug. As far as break rooms went, Q-branch was Bond’s favourite. The usual plastic chairs and tables had long ago disappeared; nobody had ever figured out where to, though some suspected that the R&D department’s project to weaponize the furniture might have had something to do with the disappearance. Instead, there were comfortable and worn sofas and arm chairs. The coffee tables here and there were at the perfect height upon which to rest a mug or laptop, all the corners were rubber edged (tired minions were a danger not only to others but themselves as well), and the room itself was a soft, neutral green that somehow made the room seem larger than the cubby-sized hole it actually was.

 

Bond had his own mug in Q-Branch, the only place he actually needed one (the only place he was in for long enough, voluntarily, to actually use one). He’d found out some months ago (again, see disciplinary report 66X33 for Alec Trevelyan - 006) that not having a personalized one could lead to disastrous results for the person concerned. The mugs of Q-Branch were as individual as their owners. Some had been bought in from home, others stolen from another department, or even mugs that were made in-house. He searched the cupboard, carefully taking out mugs so as not to accidentally drop or break any as he rummaged around for his. He knew that the most used mugs were usually at the front, or just behind the first row.

 

As Q’s second-in-command, R’s appearance was deceptive. R’s mug was a dainty teacup, complete with saucer. It had a blue flowered pattern wrapping around the cup. It looked fragile and breakable, not unlike its owner, but Bond knew for a fact that it would take several pounds of semtex to even put so much as a chip in the damn thing. Not unlike the woman herself, really. R was formidable, and most agents learned very early on not to cross her. She was efficient, sharp as nails, and had a tendency to take the newer members of Q-Branch under her wing if she deemed it necessary. R was the favourite of all the 00’s and they could get very tetchy when someone upset her. People had been known to transfer (or in one case, disappear) if she were really upset over someone. R was also now the oldest member of Q-Branch. She was widely respected by all and had a database-like knowledge of the inner workings of not just Q-Branch, but most of MI6 as well. R was also the only one who truly understood how the HR forms worked, and for that alone she was worshiped as a goddess. She had three minions who worked directly under her; the rest of the minions were spread out, but these three were special.

 

Nicky was the first of the three. Her mug was a hideous techno-coloured nightmare of a thing. It was large and chunky and would keep tea warm for hours. The mug had been a gift from her eldest daughter upon her promotion a few months back, and was her prized possession at work. Nicky was a young mother, but a hard worker who somehow, no one knew quite how, managed to balance her work life with her home life. She often said that the key to her success was her partner-in-crime. For a long time Bond had assumed that she was referring to her husband, but said ‘partner’ had in fact turned out to be her brother who’d moved in when her actual partner had moved out. He was a part-time student studying to be a graphic designer. Nicky’s 2 children, Jack and Alison, were unholy nightmares if you crossed them. Bond had previously had the “pleasure” of being on the receiving end of their exploits when they’d thought he’d been trying to flirt with their mother at the annual Christmas party; he had in fact been flirting but Nicky had thankfully explained that it was his default setting, and for her children not to take it seriously. Nicky was short, chipper, and had the ability to make you think everything would be ok right up until it all went to shit. He liked having her on comms when he was on Intel gathering missions because she would regale him with Jack and Alison’s exploits in school and the trouble they got into with their uncle’s help. He seemed as bad as the children were, until one really listened to what Nicky was actually telling you. Alan had the right idea: get into trouble alongside the children and he could make sure that said trouble never really got out of hand. Which was pretty damned smart of him, if you asked Bond.

 

The second of the three was Derek. Derek’s mug was a mystery to most. It was black, or seemed to be black. Generally it was believed that like its owner, the mug just sucked all the light from the room into its depths only to glare back at you should you look at it. There was always just a hint of a pattern or symbol on the mug that few could really make out… some kind of spiral, perhaps. But just when you thought that you’d figured out the angle with which you could see and understand, it seemed as if the mug would somehow change, and you’d end up back at square one, not understanding a thing. Not unlike its owner, really. Derek was a walking, rarely talking contradiction whom few had the privilege to truly get to know. He was dark and brooding, but very handsome with piercing, changeable hazel eyes and a jawbone that could practically cut glass. He had ever-present stubble, even if he’d actually shaved not that long ago. Get to know the man and he was warm and caring, with a dry and witty sense of humour few people got. He also, when the rare mood struck, had a smile that could light up a room. Unfortunately most people never got past the scowl or ever-present glare; a glare that has been proven to make grown men cry and interns tremble in fear. Derek had a 99% success rate when it came to his work, if only because those under him feared for their lives should they mess something up. The rumours about him were almost legendary, people often saying in hushed whispers that Derek was in fact not human at all. Bond just thought that he had an above-average intolerance for idiots. He liked Derek; they got along famously if only because they were both pretty paranoid, with justifiable reasons.

 

The third minion was Becky. Becky’s mug was a perfect reflection of her character; it seemed to be a normal, plain white ceramic mug. But the words printed on the mug pretty much summed her up:

Stress |stress|  
\- noun  
1\. The confusion created when one’s mind overrides the bodies’ basic desire to choke the living daylights out of some idiot who desperately deserves it.

Now, Becky was a tea junky not unlike her lord and master (I can’t help what they call me, Bond. Now go bother a minion and get out from under my throne!), and if the mug was present in the cupboard it was usually either because she’d actually left work for once, or was asleep in the break room. Most recently, though, a new reason was her being distracted by a certain Russian 00. James and Alec had spent many an evening during their down time with her as she monitored missions over the comms (James in the branch to bother Q, Alec there to keep James company). Becky worked best under pressure and in the dark, which explained a lot about her office space. It was tucked into a dark corner that was most often ignored, and Becky actually went pretty unnoticed if you weren’t specifically looking for her. Becky was the minion that usually dealt with the higher ups when Q was too busy (when wasn’t he) and R wasn’t in the mood (more often than not). Becky was known to be short, brisk, to the point, and not above hanging up on you if you prattled on for too long, no matter who you were. Alec had been trying for the last two months to get her to go out on a date with him, but she kept refusing. Bond would have told Alec to back off, if it weren’t for the suspicion that Becky actually liked Alec. She was, after all, the only one who could drag him down to medical and get him to stay there, and she fussed endlessly over Alec when he came back from a mission without a smirk or a smile to be seen. She knew Alec inside and out… she was like the Alec-whisperer in many ways. He gave it another month, two tops, before Becky finally caved. He just hoped Alec didn’t screw it up.

 

The Overlord of Q-Branch, Q’s mug was slightly larger than normal. It was a light cream in colour with the letter Q10 on the front. No-one was really quite sure where it had come from, as it had just appeared in the cupboard one day, and not one of the minions dared to touch it. The mug was a mystery, not unlike its owner. Nobody really knew anything about the quartermaster save that which was obvious: he was a young, scarily intelligent man, with an awful dress sense and a mop of unruly hair (that was just screaming out for James’ fingers to stroke into submission, in his opinion). Bond had long since made peace with the fact that his obsession with finding out all he could about the young man was more than just idle curiosity. James LIKED Q; he got on with him, they worked seamlessly well with each other, better than he and any other Q-Branch tech to date. The flirting between them was endless and effortless, their conversations never stilted or awkward. Q had seen him at his worst, and Bond has seen the young man at his most vulnerable. Q was either someone the field agents liked (most of all by James and Alec) or didn’t (008 and 002). He was Eve Moneypenny’s ‘darling boffin’ and aside from being Supreme Overlord was also generally regarded as being the Q-Branch mascot. To James Bond he was adorable; to the rest of the world he was utterly terrifying (able to do more damage on his laptop sitting in his pajamas before his first cup of Earl Grey than even the most successful of 00’s can do in a year in the field). Q was both an enigma and a nightmare, but once you knew how to decode Q he was the easiest person to read. Q was all about the bigger picture, which often meant that he missed the smaller ones. He wasn’t perfect and it had taken him time to realise that. But he was learning with the help of R and the trio, and of course James himself.

 

Alec, having spent so much time in Q-Branch, also had his own mug in the cupboard (but he was ABSOLUTELY NOT allowed to make his own tea unless supervised at all times by a trusted minion). Alec’s mug was big, fire-proof, and nigh on indestructible. It was an icy white and featured a cartoon picture of a pile of rubble with flames and smoke coming up from the ashes, with the message “Boom good! Fire pretty!” written underneath. It was a rather apt message and gave you all the information you needed to know about its owner. Trevelyan was Bond’s friend, his best friend and brother in all but blood. At times it was this connection between the two 00s that was only thing that kept Q and R from throwing him out of branch every time he swanned on down alone, because Alec was a whirlwind of chaos and destruction and fire. He lived to blow things up; if it could be set on fire, he would make sure to have it burning by the end of the day. Trevelyan loved a challenge, just tell him it couldn’t be done and he’d make damn sure to prove you wrong. Still, he was well-loved among the staff. 006 was one of the few agents who treated the minions with the respect they rightfully deserved, and because of this he was usually first up when it came to testing out the prototypes. Alec wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea though, and it was actually hard to get to know the big Russian beyond his booming laugh and generally awful sense of humour. Everything seemed to just roll off his back, and he was even better than Bond in a crisis situation. As 006 knew how to be serious, but as Alec he knew how to let loose and have fun. It was this love of life that had drawn James to Alec years ago, when they’d met in the Navy. But that didn’t mean that Alec Trevelyan wasn’t jaded, or that he trusted easily. He was just better at dealing with it than Bond was.

 

Finally locating his own mug, Bond carefully placed the others back into the cupboard and reached for a tea tin. That was another thing about the Q-Branch break room that set it apart from all others at MI6.

Revered nearly as much as, if not more so than the Tea Kettle, was the Tea itself. 

 

It was the good stuff; all different varieties, all of high quality. Every minion who came to work for Q-Branch got a crash course in tea making 101 thanks to R. It was the first lesson learnt, and arguably the most vital. If the branch should run out of tea, it was considered a major crisis that should be addressed immediately. An un-caffeinated Q-Branch was an unhappy Q-Branch, an unhappy Q-branch filled with intelligent and destructive people with access to technology and the means to make life miserable for everyone, and nobody wanted that. Block Q-Branch access to caffeine, cripple the nation. Bond actually feared the day enemies of Great Britain got a hold of this little bit of intelligence; the knowledge was a danger to national security in his opinion. 

 

The loose-leaf tea he selected was spooned into the strainer and left to steep for 3 minutes as Bond went to hunt down some milk to go with. This was yet another aspect that set Q-Branch above all others at MI6. The milk was never just the bog standard type. Minions actually brought stuff from home. There were a dizzying variety of bottles and containers in the fridge; full-fat, semi-skim, skim, enriched, heavy cream, organic, generic, fat free, cashew, almond, soy, and fake (some of which Q had nearly banned until someone had pointed out that unfortunately some people were actually allergic to dairy products, at which point Q wondered how the hell they’d gotten employed in Q-branch in the first place). R could always be trusted to provide generic milk for those who didn’t care or were indifferent to what they used, bless her. Q sometimes liked a touch of lemon in his tea, depending which blend he was having, and this was the reason the break room often had a citric air about it. Bond didn’t much mind as long as he could find the right milk for his own brew.

 

Bond’s own mug was old; chipped, faded and tea stained the crests of the Royal Navy printed upon it were faded and worn with age. If he was honest, he didn’t actually remember when or how he’d obtained the mug but it was strong, resilient, and had withstood the test of time. Though ugly and permanently stained inside, the mug still had a certain charm about it; a bit like a battered old classic in need of a little love and care. Q had offered to get him a new one when he’d finally noticed it, but Bond had simply shaken his head and told him he was actually rather fond of it. After that day, nobody but Q himself would dare touch the mug. Q would make him tea in his mug, and bring it to him when he was listening in on a mission or there to gossip with the staff. It had taken James a while to notice, though. He’d really only realized the rule that only he and Q were allowed to touch his mug when he’d absently asked an intern to make him a cuppa, and the poor fellow had gone white as a sheet and run away. When Bond had raised an eyebrow at this behaviour, R frowned and informed him Q had given strict instructions for it not to be touched by anyone. Q trusted only himself with it for fear of seeing it damaged or broken by some incompetent fool.

 

He paused for a moment, seriously contemplating this for the first time. Q didn’t trust anyone but himself to look after James. True, he was fiercely protective of all of his agents, there was no doubt about that, but he only trusted R, Derek, Nicky or Becky to handle his communications with Bond during Q’s down time or when he was really busy. He also got quite tetchy when people upset him or treated Bond as if he was an idiot of all muscle and no brains. Perhaps there was slightly more to their flirting than just friendship... It was a nice thought. Q handled him like he handled his mug: with great care and respect.

 

Walking out into Q-Branch proper with his tea James made his way over to Becky’s corner where Alec had his feet up on a chair and was gesturing wildly with his hands. His voice boomed across the pen as Becky hid her face in her hands, desperately trying not to laugh at whatever tale he was recounting to her.

 

“Do I even want to know?” James asked mildly as he took a sip of his tea. Alec grinned up at him.

 

“Belgravia, you remember?” Alec asked with a sly smile. James groaned. He’d thought they’d agreed to never speak of that mission again! Then, having thought of something, he smirked as he leant forward towards Becky.

 

“I hope Alec didn’t forget to tell you about the little incident he had with the suspender belt.” James winked and turned to walk away.

 

“Bastard.” Alec snorted as he turned back to Becky, who was looking at him with curiosity.

 

“Come on then… scar me for life. What’s this about a suspender belt?” She asked with a cheeky grin. Alec melted just a little bit at the sight.

 

Q spotted him before he’d even got half way across the room. From where he was standing against his main console, he gave James a warm smile as he approached, before focusing back on his typing. Sitting down on the corner of the table James tilted his head to idly glance over whatever it was Q was doing on his laptop, which appeared to look a lot like new specs for an exploding pen to him. Q caught his interest and hit a command before snapping the lid of his laptop down.

 

“If you’d take these over to Derek, thank you R.” he said handing off the USB stick he pulled from the side of the laptop. R nodded as she walked by, detouring over to where Derek was currently grilling a lower minion. If the scowl on Derek’s face was anything to go by, when combined with the state that the lower minion was in he’d been at it for some time already.

 

“Bond. Please tell me you’re here to drag Trevelyan back to work. His hopeless flirting is actually getting pretty pathetic.” Q bit out crisply as he picked up his tablet, tapped something in, and frowned.

 

“Why would I do that? It’s always so fun to watch him suffer.” Bond said, sipping more of his tea.

 

“Yes well at first I thought it funny. Now I just feel sad for him.”

 

“Now, Q. You’re only saying that because you’ve still got two weeks left in the betting pool.” Bond grinned at him. Q scowled.

 

“She’ll hold out ‘til then; I have every faith in her.” With that, Q signed off his tablet, put it down out of the way, and turned to lean against his table beside Bond, his arms crossed.

 

“Do you really think she will cave?” James asked, genuinely interested. It seemed as if she would, but he wasn’t 100% sure.

 

“Oh yes, she’ll cave. Becky is totally gone on him; she simply wants to be sure Trevelyan is serious.”

 

“He is, I can guarantee that.” Q gave him a sideways look at his tone of voice. “So, do you have any dinner plans this evening? Or is it take away again?” James asked, blatantly changing the subject and closely examining his mug now.

 

Q narrowed his eyes. This was a game they had played often, usually ending in one of them chickening out at the last minute. “Well, I for one have tomorrow off.” He replied lightly. “But seeing as I don’t actually have a life, I don’t have anything beyond the usual planned. Why?” Q asked, curious to see how Bond would be replying.

 

“Well as coincidence would have it, I have tomorrow off as well. Would you… like to get dinner with me?” James held his breath. Usually this would be the time Q would make up an excuse or brush him off. But something in his voice or on his face must have showed the other man that he was actually being serious this time.

 

“Are you asking me out as a friend, or…” Q started cautiously, the beginnings of something bright in his eyes. James smiled at him, warm and gentle and true.

 

“Or.” he said firmly, and Q full-out grinned at him.

 

“I get off at 6, pick me up at 7:30.” Q instructed as he got up and all but rushed off into the maze of cubicles. 

 

James smiled a self-satisfied smile and finished his tea. He made sure to rinse out his mug and put it carefully away with the others before strolling out of the branch. He had a date to prepare for!

-Fin-

EDIT TO ADD: - what it might have become....

I'd love a cross over between TeenWol/James bond.

It would all start like this.

Stiles a new transfer from M.I.5 into R&D, meets Derek Hale. The guy scares the hell out of him on a good day but as he get's used to life in M.I.6 Stile comes to understand the insanity that is Q-Branch. The first person Stile would bond with would be surpassingly Alec. Bonding over there shared love of all things fire, they'd hit it off rather well. 

Derek would commiserate with Bond and the pair would constantly question and complain to Q as to what he was thinking allowing thous two idiots to occupy the same space in the branch at any given time. Nicky would despair of the pair of them and plot with Becky, R and the agent's to get Stiles and Derek together because frankly the amount of UST between the pair is rather alarming. There would angst, laugh's and insane evil cats ready tot make over the world because Becky 'LIKE'S' the evil thing that lurks under her bed and pounces on unsuspecting agents who are allergic to the door bell. 

With Bond, Derek and Alec screwing up at every turn and not taking good advice when R give's it because there, all three of them idiot's, there will be Ben and Jerry's, there will be sleep over's, there will be far too much scotch and hanger over's to rival the worst of Bond and Alec's mission's. 

Kate Argent would come into play to shake things up and thats when everything really kick's up a gear. Kate was working as a bomber for Quantum, she'd be tied to Derek's family because his Mother would have worked for M.I.5 on something secret, a new formula that would render oil unnecessary for car's and other oil based machinery (code name Wolfsbain) so Quantum send's Argent out to kill her and get the formula but she messes up because Derek is the only surviver and his mother managed to send him the Wolfsbain project before she died, he has no idea he actually has the damn thing because he never bothered to open the very last parcel his family sent him (the family would have been over in the states for some kind of conference and Talia would have taken the whole family as a holiday) so she sent the project back to Derek when she started to get suspicious of the Argent's, she suspected that Kate was working as a mole in the C.I.A.) It's Bond and Alec that will find some kind of connection between Kate and Derek (maybe she meet's Derek and slept with him to get information about his family's movements, where they would be, what they were doing, what hotel they would be staying at etc and Derek wouldn't know that she'd killed his family, just that she'd left him without a word, so now he's jaded about letting anyone getting to close to him personally (Q-Branch will not stand for this, they will work together to bring joy and love into Derek and also Bond's life if it's the last thing they do, Derek and Bond WILL be happy if it's the last thing they do and they can do it, don't doubt that, they can topple government's, they can shut down entire country's and they will ruin you credit rating if you cross them so help you Alec, will you never learn)

Alec will be the one to find a solid lead, It will also turn out that Kate Argent is his somewhat nemesis, she's actually the reason in part for Alec's extensive knowledge in explodes and not just because he likes to make things go boom. she'd be someone he'd been tracking for years and dealing with for years Thus being him in on the quantum mission. 

Alec and Bond will be closing in on Kate when she does something completely unexpected, she kidnap's Q and Derek, to get Q and Derek to finish the formula (Kate had only managed to get a hold of an earlier draft that was useless and discarded by M.I.5 when Talia presented the initial proposal for the project) and Stiles and the team will have to work from within Q Branch to try and find them. Bond and Stile will actually bond over the course of the kidnapping arc. Stiles refusing to be left out and knowing Bond would be just a driven to find them as himself. Becky as well will finally give in and agree to that date with Alec. 

Stiles would also end up getting to know Becky better due to their love interest's being so far from home in branch late one night as they wait to here back from Bond about a lead on finding Q and Derek. (I actually think I'd like to have Stiles and Becky at odd's somewhat, personality clash maybe but not in a mean way, they just, until this point don't really have anything in common so find it difficult to be left alone together for any length of time) 

Alec will end up meeting up with Chris Argent during the kidnapping arc to try and work out a way to stop his psycho sister, Chris will be the one to reach out to M.I.6 when he discovers that his sister is the mole in the C.I.A. He will work out her connection to Quantum knowing that M.I.6 are investigating the organisation. When Alec and Chris go missing while Bond chases after Kate and Derek, Bond and surprisingly Derek (after he escapes on his own because he is no-one's damsel in distress) will be the one's to go after him and Kate. 

I think I'd have Bond manage to get Q back but Kate will manage to escape with Derek and of course Bond being Bond he'll go after his friend's. Q and Nicky will be the one's with the backup plan to get Bond, Alec, Derek and Chris home and Stiles and Q will finally get there men back home safe and sound.

And of course, making sure that everything turns out all right will be the mighty R. nobody get's shit done like that women :)

I'm not sure wither to kill off Kate or not, by the time the story will have wrapped up there will certainly be enough people pissed off with her. 

So there you have it, if you wish to undertake the task of writing such a story, I'd love to read it :)

**Author's Note:**

> So there we have it, all done and dusted :) like i said there's no follow up to this because I just can't write. Honestly to be frank over the years i've given up, I've gotten far too much abuse because of the dyslexic thing so I gave up and I'm actually very private about my writing now but this was kind of sitting in my folder not doing anything and it seemed ok to post up.
> 
> Also, I slipped certain charter from a certain show I consider a guilty pleasure in here, prop's to anyone who can guess, thou if your in the fandom it's pretty damn obvious :)


End file.
